**RANT ALERT**

**RANDOM RANT ALERT**

On the 26th of October, my 6 foot Christmas tree was joyously decorated with baubles and erected in the window of my living room...much to the amazement of passers-by whose gaping maws mouthed incredulity more, I suspect, than they would have had I suctioned my naked form in a Garfield stance to that very pane. 

Now then, there were several reasons for my doing this and each of those reasons comprises entirely of the words " because I f*****g can!"

As for my being told by some "it's too early" well, maybe it could be deemed so had I erected it in THEIR living room...but I didn't...did I? No!

So, I tell you what...how about YOU don't tell me when it's the right time to put my tree up and I won't tell all of you pyrotechnical premature ejaculates to stick your fireworks in an orifice of my choosing when you're frightening the shite out of my dog weeks before bonfire night, which is bad enough in itself!

Ok?

Excellent...

Thank you for tuning into Lynn's Rant...

Ps: No animals were harmed during the erecting of my Christmas tree!

Pps: Merry Christmas!!

  

©  Copyright Lynn Gerrard